NOTE: This post has been edited.

LSS OF THE DAY: "WHAT YOU OWN"

From: RENT [Movie/Musical]

I knew it wasn't gonna last long. Oh well..






So, I did leave for Manila yesterday early morning, around 2:30. I got to the dorm around 8 because I still had to change into my uniform; seriously, we still needed to wear uniforms just to get our clearance? Stupid, really. But anyway, I waited for my friends, and when everyone was there, Meg held out these bags for me and Judith; turns out they were our early birthday presents (Judith's birthday is today; mine is on the 12th). And the others gave me letters; Simon drew an angel for me.






Then we went inside our building, got our clearances and went to the Health Service because Meg had to do something there. Jay followed us there and we had fun talking to Ma'am Shake.






Stayed in the school for awhile so I read the letters they gave me. I was touched by Simon's letter and I was laughing at Meg's letter but when it came to Albert's, my heart sank.





He wrote that he likes me, and that it's actually getting close to love. I was suspecting for a while that he might actually like me but I didn't think it was like that. I kept the letter and tried to act as normally as possible. I talked to Meg and apparently, everyone in the group knew about it EXCEPT me.






"I care for you very much, and like you the same. What I feel is more than friendship, close to a romantic relationship. I am not prepared to say "I love you", though as time passes and things change, I hope to whisper it sincerely and passionately and shout it triumphantly."

That was just part of what he said, but I think he summed it all up in just these sentences.







While I was reading it, I couldn't stop thinking, "This is not happening. This CAN'T be happening." I already had a hunch that he liked me but I just ignored it, praying that it would just fade. But it didn't.







I've already thought about this ever since I first suspected that he liked me, and whatever I think or say, it always comes down to one conclusion: he's like a brother to me, and just the mere thought of me and him getting together makes me cringe because it really doesn't feel right.







I just sent him a message through Multiply. I hope he takes it as a man. I know that it'll create tensions between us, but I believe that it'll pass.






While Simon accompanied me in waiting for an FX in Espanya, Danzel walked by. He looked a bit surprised to see me with Simon (I actually saw him give something close to a "death glare" as he looked at Mon), and sure enough, he thought that he was courting me. I was talking to him awhile ago when he asked if I had a "new guy"; paranoid, much?







I left Manila around 3:40 and I arrived in Dagupan by 9pm. Whew!







So anyway, I think all the contestants on American Idol are pretty stressed out. Some of them weren't as giddy as they used to be or they seemed to space out a bit. David Cook looked exhausted after he performed and he was always smiling after he sang. I guess it's because of Idol Gives Back which will air tomorrow. Jason Castro did really well; and, alright, Christy Lee Cook did well too. I'm scared for Carly. I hope Syesha gets the boot on Friday.

"So I own not a notion, I escape and gape, content. I don't own emotion, I RENT.."

Labels: American Idol, confusion, decisions, friends and laughter, love thing, Manila life, RENT, revelations, schedules, school