LSS OF THE DAY: "WILL I"

From: RENT [Movie/Musical]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here I go again.






When was my last update? So anyway, two days ago (March 5, Wednesday), we had this team building thing with the other section. I have to admit, it was fun! I learned a lot from my fellow BESmates and I'm really looking forward to the times when we'll be working together again. And I made new friends too. We did this "Amazing Race" sort fo thing where we had to run from the fourth floor of the Tan Yan Kee building to Lovers Lane, to the field, to the Quadri, then back to TYK. I didn't eat a lot so I wasn't running as fast I should; and I even fell three times in one of the activities! But it was worth it. I'll post my pictures the next time I get home, which is like, after forever?







We even played frisbee until quarter to ten after that! Me, Meg, Jigo, and Albert stayed and later some people from BES2 joined us.






My body was so sore yesterday that I had the slightest difficulty in walking and moving a lot.







And speaking of yesterday, I was high-depressed. I was high because I was depressed. I was tired, I was depressed, and I was pissed. Some people just don't know how to show respect to some people and they don't know when to keep their mouths shut. I swear, I wanted to slap them just to keep them quiet. Many times I just wanted to tell them off, just to show how pissed I was, but I kept telling myself to be patient. Some of them asked how I was since I was so quiet and that I kept on staring into space; I appreciate their concern, but they don't know the real reason. I was really high-strung yesterday; thank goodness I was able to let off some steam.







*sigh* So many things have been happening for the past few days. Sometimes I wonder if it's all just coincidence or..I dunno..fate? I mean, what are the odds of us seeing each other in the same place three times? (Yes, I'm counting, but so what?!) He tried to get my attention last night, but pride kept me from acknowledging him completely. After everything that happened, he still thinks that everything's okay between us? Sure, he textes me more now, even though it's already super late; but still! Why does he even bother? I'm still hurting from what he did and I haven't totally forgiven him.






Although, alright, I admit, I still care for the guy; heck, I LOVE him for crying out loud! But I still can't bring myself to fully accept what he said.






But...I may say that I'm mad at him now, but when the time comes that he'll ask for a second chance, I know that I'm gonna give it to hom. My feelings are too strong; I can't avoid that. Call me stupid, call me a bitch, call me desperate, I DON'T CARE.







Just like what Albert and Jo told me last night, "He doesn't deserve you. Move on". Easier said that done, I'm afraid. But I am trying, really!

"Sometimes in my darkest thoughts, I wish I never learned what it is to be in love and have that love returned". - Written In The Stars, AIDA.

I won't be going home. Oh well. And exams are coming up. Crunch time, baby!








'Til next time, love!

Labels: depression and tears, friends, love, love thing, relapse, RENT